Susie's Rant
by amiablehacker
Summary: This is Susie's thinking process every time she sees Calvin. WARNING: This is a one-shot and it doesn't really have a plot. This is just Susie's perspective. If you want to read the version with a plot line, please read the follow-up story, Failure is Always an Option. Thank you.


He's always been a little different. That might be why I'm so drawn to him. Even when we were little kids, I couldn't help but wonder what sort of ideas circled his head. He's unlike any boy I've ever met.

He used to have this stuffed tiger with him, Hobbes. They were inseparable. I don't know what happened to Hobbes, but he never brings it up so I don't bother asking.

He's an outcast. I don't know many boys that are as imaginative as he, so his friends circle is somewhat lacking. Although, I don't think he minds all that much. Ever since the beginning of middle school he started getting reclusive, which made me all the more curious. I figured that was the point in time when he started getting into writing and video games. He has a few friends. Video game nerds tend to all find each other around middle school because no one else gets their jokes or understands what they're talking about. He fit right in, for the first time in his life. But he's smarter than a lot of the video game nerds. His vocabulary is for more expansive. He reads philosophy books for fun. Of course, he enjoys fantasy and science fiction too, but he also loves quoting the philosophers he admires. By high school, he had probably two or three good friends.

I mean, why do I like him so much, anyway? He's sarcastic, he's mean sometimes, he's hard to understand, he talks too much, and he's…_different_. And yet, every time he walks by, I have an urge to go talk to him. Just talking to him would mean so much to me, because he's so interesting to listen to. He happens to be good at explaining things, so whenever he goes off on a rant, it's somewhat easy to follow. But he's still pretty hard to understand. His opinions are based off things that are way over my head. I may be smart, but he's brilliant. When he approaches me, it's like I'm talking to a genius who took time out of an important schedule just to speak to me. I feel like we're the only two people in the world when he talks to me. He probably thinks I'm weird because when we do converse, I always have this huge smile on my face. I'm interested in things he's never heard of and vice versa.

This is stupid. So stupid. I have guys that are interested in me _right now_ but I choose to ogle him instead. He isn't even all that attractive. Well…I guess he is. He does have the blonde hair and blue eyes. Still, he does have that acne-ridden face that girls find _so _attractive. Yeah, not really. I'm pretty sure I'm the only girl who likes him, and he has no idea. I don't want to say anything because I'm afraid he won't believe me. He might not even be romantically interested in girls right now because he's so focused on writing and video gaming. Some nerdy boys will get really excited if a girl smiles at them. Others are so disinterested that they won't react at all if they're being flirted with. I have no idea which one he is, because he hides his feelings so well.

How does he view me anyway? I try to hide my excitement every time I talk to him, but I don't know if it's working. I've always viewed him as a friend. Even when we were little and he would throw stuff at me and steal my toys, he was still my friend. That hasn't changed. But I have no clue if he has _ever _viewed me as a friend, and that isn't something you can just go up and ask someone. He doesn't go out of his way to avoid me, so he tolerates me at the very least. But toleration isn't what I'm looking for.

I'm a nerd too, but I'm a book nerd. Nerds sometimes like each other, but they're usually the same kind. No, he's teetering on a rebellious nerd who doesn't like people that no one really quite understands. I'm the straight A student who constantly has a book in her hand. Apparently guys like that or something, because I've been hit on several times, but it's always guys that I would never date. Ever. My other friends think I'm crazy. I haven't told them about him. They would think I'm weird. I guess we all have those weird things we really like, right? Nerds are my thing. Well, I guess that's a lie, because it's not all nerds. Just this one.

Why? Why do I like him so much? I really shouldn't. I'm supposed to go for the guys who are _actually _hitting on me. But no. It's him. It's always been him.

It's always been Calvin.


End file.
